When It Rains, The Pain is Hidden Out of Sight
by Risa Hijikata
Summary: An alternate story-line to Chapter 7 where Yashiro and Doumeki went home after they met Kageyama and Kuga. They did not go through a detour to the adult cinema nor were they caught up in the shooting mess. That day, Doumeki only took Yashiro home in the rain. The storm proved to be hiding many feelings that they could not convey. Doumeki x Yashiro; One-shot. -COMPLETE-


**Warning:** light BL; Shounen-ai

 **Disclaimer:** Defs not mine. Woulda been crazy outta my mind otherwise.

 **Setting:** If only the shooting in Chp 7 didn't happen...

* * *

 **When It Rains, The Pain is Hidden Out of Sight**

* * *

 _When it rains, the wound inside cried with longing and I revelled in the pain it brings._

* * *

'-ss, Boss.'

Yashiro snapped back into focus to the person in front of him.

'We're here.' Doumeki monotonously stated.

His good hand ruffled the light beige hair, fixing the unruly strands in a careless manner. He looked outside of the car's window but made no move to reach the door handle.

The eyes gazing at him from the back mirror watched with slight curiosity.

'It's going to rain.' Yashiro said.

There was something in his undertone but Doumeki could not quite catch what it was. It quivered in the air for a moment before the rumble of thunder in the distance echoed with the patience of a light shower.

'It seems so.' Doumeki answered without any specific intentions. 'It's better to hurry inside...' Doumeki trailed.

Yashiro caught the gist. Doumeki tried to advice him, -with as few words as possible,- that Yashiro should enter his apartment before the storm comes.

The man himself probably also wanted to get home before he is caught in the storm.

But Yashiro would not let him.

Not yet.

There was a loud sigh from the back seat and it caught Doumeki by surprise. He glanced at the rear-view mirror to catch Yashiro watching the flickering glow of the streetlights outside.

There was a slight tension in this melancholic mood.

'What were you thinking...' Yashiro started but could not finish.

An uncomfortable silence settled and Doumeki's expression was unchangingly neutral even with the sudden change of topic in the conversation.

'...Boss?'

'...If you told him of my "youthful indiscretions", what then? Were you hoping that he'll turn my way and fall in love with me? Or even for something like, that he might sleep with me? Or perhaps for something else just as ridiculous?' The tone was clearly bitter, accompanied by a smirk at the corner of his beautiful lips that seemed more like a grimace.

'...youthful indiscretions?...' He repeated with uncertainty.

Yashiro gave a little laugh. The light ring of his laughter was sharp, as if to mock himself of a certain fact that he had over-looked.

Doumeki recognized the sound as the knife of self-derision.

'My bad, my bad. Kage knew of my "youthful indiscretions", of course. I shouldn't have called it that.' He paused for a moment, searching for a word that will suit his purpose. 'Right. Then, it was my "adolescent delusion".'

He nodded to himself for a little bit, pleased at the title that he had bestowed to the laughable feelings that he had in High School for a certain man.

'Are you talking about how you fell in lov-'

'-Doumeki.' Yashiro sharply cut in. 'It was a delusion brought about by the mind of an adolescent. Nothing more, nothing less.'

'...Then Boss,... why are you so upset that I was about to tell Kageyama-sensei about your feelings?' Doumeki hesitated before he pressed further in that gruff tone of his. 'Is this delusion not temporary?... Or could it be that Boss is,.. until now...'

The brown eyes returned Doumeki's piercing gaze over the rear-view mirror. Yashiro's gaze faltered for a second.

'It was-... is, a delusion.' Yashiro corrected himself. 'I'm not in my right mind for a long time. There's no need for him to know of this sickness because this isn't something that he can heal anyway.'

His lips pursed as he refused to pursue the subject.

Just as suddenly, Yashiro kicked the driver's seat hard. Surprised, Doumeki jerked forward from the impact.

'Don't you do something useless like that again.' He warned.

Doumeki turned his head, and saw the displeased frown decorating Yashiro's face.

'...yes, Boss.' Doumeki expressionlessly replied.

The rain had started to fall in the middle of their conversation and is currently falling harder than before.

They have missed their chance to take shelter inside of Yashiro's apartment and are now stuck inside the car parked to the side of the road, the entrance to the apartment lobby just across the road from them.

Yashiro nudged the seat in front, hard enough so that Doumeki would feel the short jabs at his back.

'See, it started raining because of you.' This unfair accusation did not faze Yashiro's subordinate the least. Instead, a low voice replied with 'Sorry, Boss' answered in response.

Yashiro pondered something for a moment, watching the rapid taps of rain hitting the glass in front of him.

'Well then, drive.'

'Where to, Boss?'

'Your place.'

A hesitant silence was Doumeki's answer.

Yashiro crossed his arms. He patiently waited for Doumeki's reaction but Doumeki could not tell at all as to what it is that Yashiro is thinking.

'Come now, drive.' Yashiro pushed.

Doumeki started the engine and moved the car into gears. Soon, they set off to the road that will lead them to Doumeki's apartment as they leave the storm behind them.

* * *

 _When it rains, the scream was covered by the sound of the thunder and I pretend that everything was alright._

* * *

Doumeki could not understand why Kageyama-sensei did not realize.

This beautiful figure, soaked and dripping wet in his apartment, with the white of his shirt clinging to his toned muscles and supple limbs, took his breath away.

He could not comprehend as to what made the doctor said all those things about Yashiro.

Doumeki did not know what this man was like in his High School years but surely, now in his age of thirty-something, Yashiro must have changed.

Like he had personally learned through experience, nothing could remain the same.

And also, this irritated feeling that had appeared in his heart a moment ago, had completely changed to something else upon observing Yashiro standing still just at the entrance of his apartment.

'Well? Are you going to get the towels or not?' Yashiro combed his soaked hair with wet fingers. The droplets of water slid down his temple towards the nape of his neck.

'I'll get it.' Turning away, he started to make his way inside. Doumeki slid out of his shoes and coat, dropping them to the floor with a wet flop. He headed for a black drawer and grabbed the first two towels stacked inside.

He returned to the front door and handed them to Yashiro. Yashiro took a towel from his outstretched hands and started to dry himself. Noticing that his bodyguard had stood stock-still, he reminded Doumeki to dry himself.

'Don't just be standing there. You too, dry yourself.'

'...yes.' Doumeki replied, his eyes never leaving Yashiro. Those eyes watched every movement and gestures that Yashiro made. Something inside him shivered.

'If you don't stop watching me like that, I'll get hard, you know.' Yashiro smiled coyly.

Doumeki was surprised as he started to realize that he had been staring. He turned his back to Yashiro, muttering a soft apology in the process.

He did not see Yashiro's half-disappointed expression, and instead quickly dried himself and offered Yashiro the choice for a bath.

'I don't need it. Just give me a change of clothes, will you.'

Doumeki came back soon with a set of his smallest clothes and pants and showed Yashiro the way to his bathroom.

Doumeki put everything inside the washing machine as Yashiro changed. Not too long after, Yashiro appeared in a black long sleeves that is a size too big and a light brown pants that he had to roll up the legs of because they were slightly too long on him.

Doumeki slightly flinched at the sight but Yashiro did not notice it.

'You're ridiculously big. Don't you have anything smaller?'

'I'm sorry.' Doumeki disaffirmed.

Yashiro accepted the apology with a shrug and settled himself comfortably on a sofa.

Doumeki's small apartment seemed wide due to the sparse number of furnitures present. The minimalistic design made the apartment looked neat but also gave a feeling of loneliness as if no one's really living in it.

But then again, Doumeki rarely came home since he started working in The Company. He had been stuck with Yashiro, guarding him twenty-four-seven to protect him.

Doumeki served him tea and he took it gratefully, cupping his fingers around the mug to take in the warmth. Doumeki was about to leave, to scrounge for something that he could serve as snacks but a foot blocked his pathway to nudge him and stopped him in his tracks.

'Just sit.'

Doumeki complied.

Yashiro lifted his foot and tucked them under him. The pose made him looked like as if he's trying to curl into a small ball.

It was cold. With the rain outside and their low body temperatures after being drenched outside, it made sense that Yashiro is trying to preserve his heat but the image made him looked vulnerable, enveloped by Doumeki's clothes that are swallowing his figure.

'Are you cold, Boss?'

'Hm?' Yashiro peeked from under the folded arms on the top of his knees, tucked securely to his chest. 'This is fine.'

A slight shiver ran through the back of Yashiro's spine as he said this.

Doumeki saw the slight movement and pulled the figure closer to him.

'Excuse me.' He muttered.

Yashiro was about to protest but the warmth he found from the wide chest was comfortable and persistent yawns started to plague him.

He drowsily closed his eyes and without realizing it, he was taken away to something akin to a dreamless sleep not a second later.

Doumeki heard the rain easing in its fall outside. And with the ceasing sound of the thunder, he could discern a light sigh from the figure beside him.

The light beige hair swayed a little from his constant breathing and Doumeki took the liberty to re-arrange the loose strands falling onto his face. He waited a while for a sudden jerk or a sudden chastise from the man but none came. So he approached closer to the sleeping face, and lightly brushed his lips to the pale skin of the forehead before him.

Yashiro lightly stirred but the rise and fall of his chest continued smoothly.

Doumeki waited, and receiving no response, he relaxed his tense shoulders and settled deeper into the sofa.

He patiently waited, for the rain to end.

* * *

Kageyama approached closer. With an umbrella that he was holding in one hand, he slowly walked up to him.

Yashiro could see his lips moved. Amongst the fall of the droplets, Kageyama had said something that he could not discern. The sound was drowned by the echo of tears hitting the bitumen.

Yashiro tried. He tried to grab that exposed wrist that's currently holding an umbrella to prevent him from leaving. But he was too late, because Kageyama had already turned his back to him and started to walk away, leaving him behind without another glance.

Yashiro stood there.

Any thoughts to chase after him was forgotten once he had glimpsed a true smile like no-other gracing Kageyama's face.

He has no right, to destroy that happiness for his own gain.

Yashiro knew that.

So he stood there. Watching his back for countless times. Everything was repeated in the dreams of a rainy day, over and over.

The pain that it gave him is hideous but he learned how to enjoy it overtime.

But today was different.

Yashiro could not see his face, hidden by the white of his umbrella.

He approached closer than he had always done and silently mouthed something with sweet sadness.

Yashiro was taken aback when the figure moved to kiss his forehead, and the dream scattered like the remains of ashes in a breeze.

He woke up to see Doumeki next to him. Asleep, his head rested on the back of the sofa and his limbs are in an uncomfortable position to accommodate Yashiro.

Yashiro watched the rain through the window outside and realized that the rain had stopped a while ago.

When it rains, the wound inside of him cried with longing and he revelled in the pain it brings... That's how it always was and that's what he had always done.

...But then, why? ...Why did he feel relief when those quiet words were uttered?

Yashiro closed his eyes and recalled his words. Tracing the phantom kiss on his forehead, he repeated it to himself, over and over.

* * *

 _There is an end to this rain._

* * *

Doumeki hated his empty house.

Phantom shadows lurk behind every closed doors and it unsettled him.

He always hesitated on the front door, unsure of what kind of sight will greet him the moment he opened it even though he knew that no one will be there.

Mirages of the past haunted him but today was clearly different.

The rain occupied his thoughts and the sound of thunder masked his fears. The warmth next to him made everything safe and secure, and he found something comfortable with that serene expression leaning at his upper arm.

He patiently waited for Yashiro to wake but the comfort proved to be too much for him.

He fell asleep before he knew it.

It was not long before he moved into a light sleep. A stirring on his arm pulled him out of a deep sleep and made him conscious.

There weren't any more movement and he continued to close his eyes in an assumption that Yashiro is still asleep.

He could hear the rain started to stop, the silence that it brings is jarring to his ears. He tried to focus his hearing to something else, another constant noise that would distract him from the loud thoughts of his mind.

Yashiro's light breathing was like a soft sigh. The constant rhythm made it easy for him to focus to the soft whispers of sounds. He listened attentively, and his pulse quickened for every hitch of gasps that Yashiro's dream evoked.

He did not know when he fell into a deep sleep once more.

But when he woke up, he found a blanket to be covering him snugly and the seat next to him empty with only the slightest remnant of warmth.

There was a note on the table, written in a familiar hand writing.

"What kind of a bodyguard falls asleep along with the Boss? Let me suck you next time and maybe I'll let you off with that."

Doumeki folded the note into his chest pocket.

Something within him sighed in relief and yet hints of disappointment are also present.

Through the window, he could see that the rain had cleared to give way to another day.

* * *

 **A/N:** no point to this fic. Just feels.


End file.
